My relationship with change

At my house there’s only a handful of things you’ll see on our TV: Top Gear (or the Grand Tour when the new season comes out!), Yorkshire vet and some sort of Mega build type program. We’re most certainly creatures of habit in our house when it comes to the goggle box.

I myself am a creature of habit, I simply do not like sudden changes. However, since August we’ve been through some pretty major and harsh ones.

If you’ve every met me in real life you will know how hard it is for me to go through periods of change. More often than not I will have private break downs behind closed doors and be running off a constant supply of anxiety for the weeks after it. Change and me do not mix well.

I feel sorry for God in someway during these times of change. I’ve started trying to picture God as this big, warm comforting farther figure and me a small child who’s sitting on his lap (I got this idea from a book called Bloom by Beauty Beyond Bones). During these times of change I always picture myself as the small child squirming, lashing out and wailing with pain, but God’s big strong arms hold me close in a loving embrace. My tiny fists don’t even phase him and slowly I wear out of energy, my crying stops and God just holds me in love. Change is painful for me and boy God has heard my cries more than enough time about it.  Continue reading “My relationship with change”

Healing through poetry

I think poetry is the Marmite of the writing world. People seem to either love it or hate it, there is no in-between.

I love poetry, it’s basically written art in my eyes. Buuttttttt I’m pretty terrible at it.

I’ve written it since I discovered what it was. Admittedly, my GSCE english assessment kinda dampened my glow for it. Apparently you can only be told that you’re not good at it so many times before you start to belive it.

However, last year I picked it up again and it’s done wonders for me. Continue reading “Healing through poetry”

Getting genuine engagement as a ‘new’ blogger

Since starting up Lost In The Story, I have gone a bit twitter mad.

I’m always on it, whether it’s looking a science gifs of big sea creatures eating smaller fish or finding recommendations of books to read, I’m always on it.

Truth be told, I don’t post all that often. Sure I retweet things but not really post. I’m not witty or sarcastic enough to really have a voice on twitter. I’m just the weird kid in the corner who is secretly listing in on your conversations, or at least that’s how I feel.

One thing I’ve started to do is follow more bloggers. This is mainly down to the fact that I’m in a class of 8 at college where none of my peers have much in common with me. I just want to find comfort in like-minded people, so I turn to bloggers because bloggers are epic!

I’m not really into beauty or fashion blogging, because I have no sense of style and am too lazy to wear makeup. However, I love reading books, have a passion for God and care a lot about people’s mental heath. None of these things are popular niches in the blogging world, so I have to put some effort in to find these sorts of blog.

In doing my detective work on twitter, I’ve stumbled across something a bit unsettling Continue reading “Getting genuine engagement as a ‘new’ blogger”

Not as I had expected

Hope you’ve all had a meaningful Easter.

I’m currently hiding behind a new laptop and am not home, so this post will be short and to the point… for once…

Last year I did a weeks work experience at the Christian Schools Worker Project (CSWP). I shadowed a lovely young woman who was passionate about God and I really enjoyed my time there.

Something that I spotted in her office was her prayer wall. I thought that the idea behind it was really cool. I don’t know about you, but my prayer life is a bit all over the place. I find it hard to remember what I’m meant to be praying for and I never really recognise when prayer has been answered (unless it’s something big and smacks me in the face). Continue reading “Not as I had expected”

How I’ve made it this far

This week I’ve been completing work experience as part of my college course. I’ve been at a fantastic place called ‘Designs in mind‘. They’re a designer and maker studio refered through mental health services.

I have another week left at the studio and I can say that I’m throughly looking forward to it. The project is just amazing and they’re making such a positive impact in people’s lives and the in the local community.

During this week I’ve had a lot of time for relection on my bus journey home. After talking with some of the people there I’ve looked back on my own path and my mental health and wondered how I’ve made it this far. Continue reading “How I’ve made it this far”

Walking blind

Every now and then God shows me something that really blows my socks off.

Part of me really wishes that God would give me visions and dreams, words of knowledge and all that big bright flashy gifts, to use me in a visible and active way to show his love to people directly. However, so far he hasn’t what is also chill as well. I’ve never had a word for someone or anything like that, but that doesn’t mean he can’t show me things.

Occasionally he reveals things to me about the path he’s taking me on that really does make me go ‘wow’. In my darkest moments I can see his hand in all of it and whilst that doesn’t take away the pain of the situation, it does give me hope and comfort.

That’s what I’d like to share with you today. Continue reading “Walking blind”