When I was younger I went to an event called ‘World Thinking Day’ with Girl guiding. It was held in Telford and attended by hundreds of girls. That particular year, we were looking at different cultures. There were activity, weird tasting food and we got to meet some epic people.
One of those people was a lady from South Africa. I don’t remember much of the activity we did with her but she said something that has stayed with me even today.
Your words are powerful but your words can hurt.
As a 11-year-old I had already experienced several times how hurtful words could be yet I’d never considered them to be powerful
It’s been a while since I mentioned my recovery from the ED hasn’t it?
I’ve been on a whorl wind of a journey and it’s not over yet. But in the last two weeks God’s really shifted something in my heart and I’ve committed to full, 100%, compleat recovery.
I can say now that I will beat it and I will recover.
Getting to this point has been hard. I’ve technically been ‘recovering’ since I developed the ED however, all of these attempts have been half-hearted and without God. If I’m honest, I haven’t really wanted to get better. I knew I had to get better, so I tried to, but I didn’t really want to.
I’ve had the ED for two years and that’s two years my life that has been wasted.
Considering I’ve only been recovering for two weeks now, I’m still needing a lot of support. There is no way that I could have gotten this far without God and my boyfriend’s constant reassurance.
I’ve found that the closer I draw to God, the easier it is to fight it, to get better. I’m not saying that recovery is easy, because it’s not, but I’m slowly learning to lean on God’s strength and not my own. Not to mention surrounding myself in his word brings my attention back to his love for me and doesn’t let me get sideswiped too easily by my own self hatred.
So on the subject of how powerful words are, especially God’s word, I’d like to share this with you as it was a bit of an eye opener for me.
The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. – Proverbs 18:21
Death and life are in the power of the tongue, what we say can ever bring life or death.
Let that sink in.
What you say, can either bring life or death.
In most cases this can be applied to what we say to other people. That verse teaches us that we need to be kind to our neighbors and friends because as a Christian we can either be speaking life or death into their life.
What what about speaking into our own lives?
I know I’m not the only one who speaks to myself or lets my mind run off in a misguided rant. Wether you realise it or not, you are constantly speaking into your own life.
Let me explain…
When I speak from my anxiety or the ED I am speaking death over myself. When I say I’m worthless, I’m broken, I’m pathetic, I don’t deserve recovery, I’m fat, I am speaking death over myself.
God didn’t create me so I could hate myself. No, God created me with a plan and a purpose. So when I’m speaking death into my life I’m walking further and further away from God.
You might be the type of person who has a good chunnter at yourself if you’ve gotten something wrong, or you might be like me who constantly hounds myself with negative thoughts. If someone snaps at me my immediate though is that I’m pathetic, they’re right I can’t do anything. I don’t stop to think if that person is just having a though time else where and is simply taking it out on me. Or if I walk by a mirror my immediate though is I’m so fat I need to lose weight. Either way though these negative comments are not good for us.
John 10:10 tells us that the thief (Satan) only comes to steal, kill and destroy and it’s so right. By speaking death into our lives we’re just doing the devils job for him. We’re creating an opening for him to come into our lives to steal and destroy.
So how about we stop that?
God gives us the ability to speak life into out own lives, please don’t mistake that as a green light for pride and arrogance because it’s not. What it is though is the ability to read the word of God and speak those promises over our lives. If you’ve had a word of knowledge or a picture off someone speak that over yourself. You are who God says you are.
Instead of speaking death I can say something else. I can say I am loved, I am made whole in Christ, I am deserving of recovery, I am a child of God. All of these statements are coming from a place of love and identity in Christ. I can only speak life into my life if I let God into my life, because he’s the only one who can give life.
It is through God that I can say that I deserve to recover from anorexia.
I have a long way to go before I can live a life free of the ED, but I’m getting there. It’s hard and it’s a conscious decision every day to walk with God and to not listen to the lies of the enemy. But it’s going to be worth it.
To wrap up this post I’d like to leave you with a question. I’ve started asking myself it every time I think about myself. I know I was surprised, and somewhat saddened by my answer, but I’m working towards being kinder on myself. So I’d like to offer that same question to you.
Are you speaking life or death into your own life?